HARD CONVERSATIONS · WORDS THAT WORK, BY AGE
How to tell your kids.
Nobody teaches parents how to say the unsayable, and in the moment, everyone freezes. These guides exist for that moment. Each one follows the same path: steady yourself first, then the words that work at each age — actual sentences you can borrow — then the questions kids ask next, what to avoid, and what the days after tend to look like.
They are free, no account needed, and written against the published guidance of the organizations that know children's grief best — each guide names its sources.
Last reviewed 2026-07-09 · review by bereavement professionals in progress
A grandparent or great-grandparent has died
Telling children a grandparent has died
For many children, a grandparent's death is the first death they ever face. How you handle this conversation becomes their template for every loss that follows — and it can be a good template.
12 min read
Their mother or father has died
Telling children their parent has died
There is no harder sentence to say to a child. This guide is for the surviving parent or caregiver who has to say it — while shattered themselves — and for the days that follow.
15 min read
Their brother or sister has died
Telling children their brother or sister has died
When a child's sibling dies, they lose their playmate, rival, and roommate all at once — while their parents are drowning. This guide covers the telling, the guilt kids carry in secret, and the changed household after.
14 min read
Their pet has died, or a friend or classmate has died
When a pet or a friend dies
A child's first death is often a pet — and how you handle it becomes their template for every loss after. A friend's or classmate's death is rarer and rattles deeper. Both griefs are real, and both deserve to be taken seriously.
12 min read
They're asking what happens to the body
Explaining cremation and burial — what happens to the body
Kids ask directly: "Where is Grandma's body? What happens to it in the ground?" Adults panic, but the questions are healthy — and the calm, matter-of-fact answers are easier than you fear. Plus: what kids will see at a viewing or funeral, and whether they should go.
12 min read
A terminal diagnosis in the family
Telling children someone they love is dying
When the doctors say there is no cure, children need to hear it from you — early, honestly, and in words their age can hold. How to tell them, what they will ask, and how to use the time that remains.
12 min read
A parent's or sibling's cancer diagnosis
Explaining cancer and treatment to children
The word alone frightens children — usually with the wrong picture. How to explain cancer, chemo, hair loss, and hospital time honestly, answer "will you die?" without lying, and keep family life steady through treatment.
12 min read
A grandparent's Alzheimer's or dementia
Explaining Alzheimer's to children — when Grandma forgets your name
Being forgotten by someone who loves you is one of childhood's strangest hurts. How to explain a brain illness, keep visits worth making as they change, and help children grieve someone who is still here.
11 min read
The loss of a pregnancy or an infant
Telling children about miscarriage, stillbirth, or the baby who won't come home
You told them a baby was coming, and now you have to tell them the baby died. How to explain a loss you're barely surviving yourself — honestly, without frightening them, and without carrying it alone.
11 min read
A death by suicide in the family or community
Talking to children about suicide
The hardest telling there is. How to explain a death by suicide honestly and safely — in words that protect children from shame, from secrets, and from fear — and how to leave the door open for every question after.
13 min read